Put your hand up who among us hasn't had a bender.
Okay, just as we thought, plenty.
And it's fair to say after said bender, you woke up more than a little dusty and immediately started to piece together the night before together.
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Once you'd down a handful of Beroccas and located your phone, wincing at some of the texts you sent your ex-partner, the post-mortem begins.
What was that drink we ordered? Why did we get kicked out of the nightclub? How did we get home? Why can’t I get rid of this kebab breath? Anyone seen my wallet?
Oh, and by the way, did anyone take the illicit drugs that were on a table in the hotel room?
You know, the illicit drugs in that video everyone's seen?
It seems those from the NRL's Integrity Unit went more Miss Marple than Dirty Harry in probing Storm players Cameron Munster, Brandon Smith and Chris Lewis over the now infamous post-season hotel room party.
In an extraordinary coincidence, none of the three could remember what that white substance on the table was.
If was as if they had miraculously morphed into Zach Galifianakis, Bradley Cooper and Ed Helms.
Melbourne Storm CEO Justin Rodski admitted he didn’t know what the white lines in front of Smith were because, get this, he wasn't in the room at the time.
Well then, it must be case closed.
— Chip Le Grand (@Melbchief) October 5, 2021
Courier-Mail journalist Peter Badel did what Rodski should have done with his three players – started asking questions.
"You should be embarrassed as a club. You go on about doing a robust investigation (yet) they claim they can’t remember what they took or didn’t take despite video evidence," Badel told Rodski before coming off his long run.
"This is a farce, you are playing us all for fools. There is clear vision. Are they going to admit to anything?
"What was on the table? Sugar? Candy? If you're doing a robust investigation as the CEO, how do you not know?"
Rodski reached for the "I wasn't there so don’t know defence" before continuing: "This is not a farce. This is a serious situation that the club is dealing with and has imposed significant sanctions on each of the players. It's not spin."
So, if there's no proof of drug taking and no admission from the players they took drugs, why was the trio hit with heavy fines and suspensions?
And why is Munster heading to rehab after swearing off grog for 12 months.
A farce is exactly what it is.
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