Best fantasy football team names 2017

Sporting News

10 September 2017 at 10:54 am

We all know that updating rankings, spotting sleepers, studying cheat sheets, participating in mock drafts, coming up with a good draft strategy and other assorted nerdy stuff like that are integral components of getting ready for another season in the fantasy saddle. (Note: Don't Google 'Fantasy Saddle'.) We also know that the most crucial thing you can do in 2017 -- or any season, really -- is come up with the best fantasy football team name possible.

Is it more important than drafting a good team? Yes. Is it more important than your family? Yes. After all, if you fail to think of a funny team name, your family won't respect you...moreso than they already do for devoting so much time and energy to picking football players for your imaginary team.

What makes a good fantasy team name? Inside jokes with the rest of the people in your league get the job done, especially when they're insulting, but you can't expect us to help you with that. Puns based on pop culture references (especially "Game of Thrones" and O.J. Simpson, apparently) or a player's name are probably the most popular options for a fantasy team name, and while most are cringe-worthy, you can occasionally find one that moves you enough to smirk or, on a good day, very briefly chuckle.

That area between "ugh" and "heh" is our sweet spot.

Below you'll find team name ideas that we've been compiling for the past couple years, including new winners like "Baby Got Dak", "The Mixon Administration," and "FartSmellus Buttnut." See, gold. You can't make that stuff up. You'll be able to tell the old ones because they involve players that aren't nearly as fantasy relevant anymore and/or dated references ("Jamaal About That Bass" seemed like it would live forever). If you don't get some of these references, it's your own fault.

Alright, let's get into it. If you can't find something you like here...just keep looking.

Best fantasy football team names for 2017

Dakstreet's Back

Pimpin’ Ain’t Breesy

Zeke Squad

Stairway to Evans

Highway to Bell

Mariota Kart

Ingram Toenails

Games of Jones

Fournettecation

Kelce Lately

Your Brate Is Sealed

O.J.'s Parole Board

DRAFT STRATEGY AND TIERS:
Quarterback | Running back | Wide receiver | Tight end | D/ST

Frankly, Ameer, I Don't Give a Damn

Clam Crowder

Dez Dispensers

Boom Boom Powell

Bilal We've Got

That's Bilal, Folks!

Baby Got Dak

Dak and Yellow

The Black Crowells

The Counting Crowells

Crowella du Ville

DOMINATE YOUR DRAFT: Ultimate 2017 fantasy football cheat sheet

Sanu Jack City

Green Initiative

I Gotta Thielen

Hooked on a Thielen

More than a Thielen

Can't Stop the Thielen

Thielen Like Makin' Love

Ain’t No Such Thing as Halfway Cooks

Cobb Deep

Steady Cobbin’

Death Ertz-tificate

DRAFT STRATEGY AND TIERS:
Quarterback | Running back | Wide receiver | Tight end | D/ST

Martellus All About It

Czar of the Martellustrator

FartSmellus Buttnutt

Amari 2600

Amari Teenage Riot

Sterling SilverWare

Ware Bears

T.Y. Dolla $ign

T.Y. Very Much

The Mixon Administration

Praise the Jord-y

Tate is Enough

Tate Misbehavin'

Hogan's Heroes

Golden McCaffrey

Christian Missionaries

Fanatical Christians

DOMINATE YOUR DRAFT: Ultimate 2017 fantasy football cheat sheet

Sims City

All About the Benjamins

Hurns Notice

Born to Maclin (This is better than "Return of the Maclin".)

All I Do is Winston

I’ll Make You Jameis

For the Winston

Dirty Landry

Landry Service

Gym, Tannehill, Landry

Le'Veon a Prayer

Golladay Inn Express

Upper Deckers

Stacked Deckers

Gospel According to Matthews (or "Mathews" if you draft Ryan Mathews like an idiot.)

Gospel According to Luuuuuuuuuuke (Get that Panthers D/ST, son.)

All That I Snead

All You Snead is Love

Can You Diggs It?

Diggs in a Blanket

Honeybaked Beckham

Green Eggs and Beckham

Dude, You're Getting O-Dell!

O-Dell No

Rawls Royces

Alshon of the Dead

Deshaun of the Dead

Marshawn of the Dead

Brees the Sheriff

Bad and BouBrees

Touchdown Breesus

Poppin’ Bortles

Bortles Service

Shady’s Gurley Party

Al Hurns and Gurley

Keenan-Ivory-Dwaynes (Sure, you need Keenan Allen, Chris Ivory, Dwayne Allen and Dwayne Harris to pull this off, but, I mean, just do it, ok?)

Hyde and Go Luck Yourself

Hyde and Tyreek

Floyd Rage

Pop-Lockett-Drop It

Hot Lockett

Pocket Lockett

Eastbound and Brown

Saving Matt Ryan

Song of Matty Ice and Fire

Roethlisberger Helper

Palmer? I Hardly Know Her!

Mariota Had a Little Lamb

Demaryius Had A Little Lamb

Make Demaryica Great Again!

A Gronking in December

Abdullah Oblongata

DeVante’s Inferno

MegaErtz

View From Lamar

Lamar the Merrier!

Lamar You Serious?

Serial Miller

Miller’s Bossin’

Chronicles of Riddick

Let's Get Riddickulous!

Dandy Merediths

Steady Cams

Keep Choppin’ Woodhead

Bringin’ the Woodhead

Take ‘em to the Woodhead

Land of the Freeman

Get Your Tyreek On

Rudolph the Red-Zone Reindeer

Parker/Lewis Can’t Lose (You're going to have to overdraft DeVante Parker and Dion Lewis for this, but don't worry -- you won't lose.)

Murray Convention (Get both DeMarco and Latavius and let your freak flag fly.)

Dalton’s Abbey

The Hauschka Always Wins

Gould Members

You Know You Gano Lose

Scobee Snacks

Yippee Ki Yay Justin Tucker

We’re Allen this Together

Reeding Rainbow

Here’s My Number, So Call Me Brady

InstaGraham

Golden Grahams

The Tannehills Have Eyes

The Jeremy Hills Have Eyes

Dude, Where’s My Carr?

The Backfields and McCoys

The Gurley Gates

Gone Gurley

El Gordo Y La Flacco

Giovani Vidi Vici

It’s Von Like Donkey Kong

Ajayi Another Day

13 Reasons Ajayi

Staff Infection

Lacy Underalls

Rebel Yeldons

Turn Goff the Lights

Goff and Wet and/or Soft and Wentz

Mercedes Wentz

Just Say Wentz

Fleener Than a Junkyard Dog

Mr. Rodgers' Neighborhood

Don't Eli To My Face

Let Sleeping Dogs Eli

Boldin the Beautiful

99 Problems But a Fitz Ain’t One

Gore Values

Suh-Tang Clan (Ain't Nuthing Ta F Wit)

Suh-and-a-Half Men

Jamaal About That Bass

Wings of a Davante

Peachy Keenan

Turn Down for Watt

Turn Down for Watkins

Rage Against the Vereen

DOMINATE YOUR DRAFT: Ultimate 2017 fantasy football cheat sheet

Winning is My Forte

Ladies and Edelman

Blountsprout and Ivorysaur

Blount Force Trauma

Johnson and More Johnson

Kizer Wide Shut

Ezekiel 25:17

To Be Prosise

Kissing Cousins Good-bye

Special Zay

MORE:
32 Teams, 32 Fantasy Sleepers

The Big Gronkowski

Vinnie Iyer, Jordan Heck, Tony Fortier-Bensen, and Ellis Williams all contributed to this article.